Monday, September 9, 2013

50 first dates

i have watched the ending to the movie 50 first dates over 10 times in the past 2 days. i just can't help myself. to me it is so romantic.

and then it hit me. it's more than romantic to me. it's hope-filled. this man falls in love with this woman who has lost her short term memory and wakes up every morning not remembering him. if he could fall in love with a woman with such a big physical difficulty, don't you/i think someone could fall in love with me - someone who has mental health difficulties?

i know it's just a movie - but in real life, people aren't perfect. i was at lunch with my uncle in ca and he said that you just find someone who's oddities are what you can put up with.

i know that my life is and has been going according to god's plan for me. it hasn't been what i've wanted. by my age i thought (and had planned) to be a certified speech therapist, be married and have one maybe two kids. but these other paths he's been having me go on have been much to my benefit. i could not have handled the pressure of graduate school and a mental health disorder. or been able to take care of a husband and kids. 

as much as i want to have kids and be married at this time in my life, i know it's my time to be patient, learn and really know the dbt skills and apply them to my life, and then later i'll be blessed with the things my heart yearns for. it's hard to watch friends and family have what i want - but they are kind enough to share their babies, so it all works out in the end :)

and i guess what i'll take away from my movie watching is that there is 
the possibility of love for the imperfect.

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