i realize i should probably do a few things ... work on my driver safety course for example (because yes i speed and yes i got a ticket, again) ... finish my patient notes for the day ... read the book my counselor recommended - or do the worksheet he gave me ... make dinner ... exercise ... but the simple fact is i don't want to do any of those things, and so in the words of ellen degeneres "procrastinate now, don't put it off!"
my life has been normal, uneventful even, today. a patient of mine wasn't there when i got to the house, my other four were good. i found humor in the embarrassing question of the cashier this morning, "How are you doing ma'am?" as he was ringing up my tylenol, tampons, and variety of chocolate.... !! (and may i just say i wanted to shout at him, "you're not blind! how do you think i'm doing??!!) showered after getting home, turned my a/c down to 70 because i am H O T pretty much all the time, and so the day progressed.
so many rambling things i want to talk about, but i think i'll stick with what my friend sent me in an email :: don't let the rush rush you.
so often i let the rush of work, anxiety, home, cleanliness, 'to-do's', and the like rush me. i get wrapped up in a pace i think i should be running when in fact i'm not a runner! or a jogger! or a walker! i'm a mosey-er! i like to mosey. that's how i walk. i like to look and think and just be when i walk. seriously, where would i be in such a hurry to go? the whole point of a walk is to be on a walk, right? or is it a checklist thing.... in my world, it's to walk, not to check something off, so i mosey. or meander. but never do i run. physically. :)
mentally, i run. too much. worry. too often. think. over-think until my poor little brain is fried. and so, when i feel the rush rushing me, i will remember to slow down. to focus on what is most important, and let the other things go. i will s l o w d o w n my thoughts and do my best.